Freckles in April: I Called the Police Over Spilt Milk

Friday, March 22, 2013

I Called the Police Over Spilt Milk

One Saturday night a few weeks ago we went to bed early. Church starts at 9am and Aaron has meetings starting at 6. All lights in our house except my bedside table lamp were out by 10pm.

I was reading while Aaron dozed beside me. All was quiet. And then I heard a cup fall in the kitchen.

It's a sound I know well- it's the exact noise made when my boys drops one of the plastic kid cups we've gotten at Barro's. I put my book off my lap and Aaron cracked an eyelid. "Did you hear that?" I asked. "They are STILL up."

I stalked out of our room and let out a warning, "Booooys!" I was surprised by how dark it was in our living room. We usually leave at least the bathroom or hallway light on in case either of them need to go potty in the night. I was surprised they had been wandering around in that kind of darkness.

I easily identified the source of the noise. A cup lay on the floor by our kitchen table and a huge puddle of milk splayed outward from where it lay. Were the boys getting themselves milk? They've never attempted it before. Odd.

I set off for their room, expecting to find them giggling and pretending innocence while playing with blocks or reading books. Instead, I found two little boys snuggled deep in their beds totally oblivious to the world. I poked them. I talked to them. I couldn't figure out how they managed to knock the milk over less than 60 seconds prior and be that deeply asleep. I was fairly certain I had heard footsteps after the cup dropped. Was that them running back to their room?

I walked back through the dark hallway. As I emerged from the hallway into the kitchen something caught the corner of my eye. Our sliding door and blinds were open. One of the slats was pushed outward and caught on the track. It was just wide enough to allow a person.

Slider situation recreated the next morning

I stood for just a moment pondering. Could the wind have knocked the milk over? It wasn't windy. Perhaps it was the heater kicking on kind of forcefully? I put my hand out and felt only a bare minimum of air movement. I looked at the amount of milk on the floor and decided the cup would have been pretty heavy and required human or animal force to fall off the table. And then I ran for Aaron.

We checked the house thoroughly. We locked all doors and checked all the windows. After 15 minutes or so I said, "You know..maybe I should call the police non-emergency line and just ask them to patrol the neighborhood."

I kept trying to explain to the dispatcher that we were fine and I was only asking if they could drive around the neighborhood for a bit but she kept interrupting- "Have you checked under the beds? Do you know anyone who might want to break into your home or harm you? Did you hear voices?" The dispatcher chided me for not calling more quickly. I felt silly when she asked if we had any weapons and I responded, " husband has some nun chucks..."

Less than 2 minutes after I got on the phone, two policemen were at our door. They got out their guns and flashlights and cleared our house and yard. We talked briefly about home security and then they left.

We still aren't entirely sure what happened. We are 90% sure we closed the slider before we went to bed but I bet we forgot to lock it (I'd like to think this is uncommon but odds are good we do it a lot since I tend to think of it as Aaron's job and he doesn't think about it at all). But we almost never open the slider without also opening the blinds. The slat stuck on the track tells me that someone last passed that way going OUT rather than when we were coming back IN earlier in the evening.

My guess is that someone walking along the (semi-major) street behind our house noticed our house was dark and likely thought that, at 10:30 on a Saturday night, there was no one home. They tried the slider and it was open. Our kitchen was quite dark though and they bumped into our table and knocked over the milk. They paused a moment to listen, heard me talking to Aaron and they made a speedy exit.

Needless to say, it took Aaron and I a good long while to get to sleep. We stayed up for a few hours watching Duck Dynasty and trying to get over the unsettling mental image of a stranger in our kitchen. The next day we ordered a bunch of security stuff. Needless to say, we haven't forgotten to lock our doors since.


  1. Oh. my. goodness. That is terrifying! Glad you're all safe!

  2. Oh my gosh, that is so scary!!! I'm glad you're all okay.

    Maybe it was Santa, just looking for some middle of the year loving. He saw you'd left out some milk, assumed there would be some cookies too, and when he was there wasn't, he left! ;)

  3. Yowzers, that's scary!

    (Also, I don't mean to downplay the scariness going on here, but your title could not be more perfect. +10 points for Gryffindor!)


  4. OMH, totally scary. I can't believe how calm you and Aaron both were. I'm with the police on this one. I do a complete scan (under beds, in the shower and in closets) every time I go into a hotel room. This would have made me lose my poop.

    (We have an alarm system and I'm nervous that all it does is give us a false sense of security.)

    Glad all is well. Phew.

  5. I'm going to get myself some nun chucks.

  6. WHAT THE WHAT?!?! How did you not tell me about this! How did you sleep again??? I'm so glad everything is ok, and thank goodness that cup of milk was left out!

  7. That is just too creepy. *shudder* Glad you're okay!

    ...although I have to admit, I thought you were going to say, "We're pretty sure they snuck in, got themselves a drink, then took off when they spilled it and made a lot of noise." Mostly because it reminds me of how my grandma thought someone had broken into her house to take a shower. Not to take jewelry or money or the take a SHOWER.

  8. Holy. Crap. SO glad you guys are OK! Scary stuff.

  9. I think I would feel violated. That is awful. My home is my sanctuary and I'm sure you feel the same. So glad everything is okay.

  10. This totally takes me back to this one time in college when I came home from a late night of studying and saw a tall, dark figure in our kitchen. As soon as I opened the door, he booked it out our back door and my completely sane and rational self chased after him into a dark alley.

    Hopefully it's not night float time at the Camp when Grace reads this post.

  11. omg my heart was beating throug my chest while i read this!! i'm so glad you're all ok!!!!!!!

  12. Um, I would be absolutely freaking out! I used to have nightmares about someone breaking into our house. My husband works for a company that sells security systems, but because we rent and don't own, we can't get a system installed. It makes me SO paranoid!! This is just straight up creepy.

    Also, love the title of the post. Very funny and clever. Caught my attention for sure!

  13. Oh, I have goosebumps! I, too, thought you were going to say the intruder got thirsty and needed a beverage. I thought milk was an odd choice... and the nun chucks made me laugh! Glad you're all safe. Whew.

  14. yikes!!! eebie-geebies!! so glad you guys are safe!

  15. omggggggg :(
    glad nothing happened! thanks God!

  16. This is the best title for the worst situation, EVER. I'm so glad you're all OK!

  17. When I first read this, I was reading it on my ipod in bed after turning out all the lights in the house. I may or may not have gotten out of bed and double checked the doors in my house. Glad your family is safe and that the intruder understood the seriousness of your mom voice.

  18. So I totally should not have read this while my husband was on call at the hospital overnight. Let's just say that I checked our sliding door like 18 times before I went to sleep.
    Btw, back when I lived in KC my apartment got broken into while I was gone. The cops said that one of the ways to steer intruders in the other direction is to have a dog. Then they said that they recommend that people with houses set out dog bowls even if they don't have dogs just to give the appearance that there may be a dog in the house. I would have never thought of it. Anyway, just thought that was a good (and inexpensive) tip to pass along!
    Anyway, glad you're safe!!!
    -Kelly Jo

    PS - Love the title!

  19. I am extremely impressed by how calmly and logically you responded to the situation. I watch too much Law and Order and Criminal Minds; I would've been freaking out when the glass dropped. I'm glad everyone is okay, but, goodness, that is absolutely frightening!


  20. Of COURSE I laid in bed last night and felt nervous. . . .


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